In a previous post, I wrote about intense kids and the importance of understanding that intensity is part of a child’s CoreSelf, an inborn temperament trait. Intense children are high-maintenance children. They feel their feelings strongly, whether it’s happiness and joy or anger and disappointment. As an intense person myself, I can tell you that one never, ever has to wonder what we are feeling. Our default mode is to wear our feelings on our sleeve. Can you relate?

It’s easy to get frustrated with intense kids. If you are low intensity, and just let things roll off your back, and your child takes everything to heart, it’s super easy to accuse them of “making a big deal about everything,” which does nothing to help your child manage his intensity. And it’s your job to help your child manage their inborn temperament traits so they can be effective in the world. Read More

Parenting an intense child can be frustrating and will test us as parents on a daily basis. High intensity kids feel everything deeply: the positive emotions (happiness, joy, delight) AND the difficult emotions (anger, sadness, hurt). You never have to wonder how a high intensity child feels about something because they show you by whooping, wailing, or raging! Did you know that a person’s intensity level is an inborn trait? Your child can’t change their intensity level. But you can (and must) help them manage their intensity so they grow up well-adjusted! Read More