Blog posts of by Nancy Rose in the category of acceptance

Video Parenting Tips: ADAPTABILITY (the Second Trait of the CoreSelf)

Posted by | Acceptance, Kids | No Comments

Hi, everybody,

Nancy Rose here, author of Raise the Child You’ve Got—Not the One You Want.

We’re going to be going over each of the Nine Traits of the CoreSelf. Now, if you’re not familiar with the concept of the traits of the CoreSelf, or of the CoreSelf, I encourage you to go back and look at Episode #3, which talks about what these Nine Traits represent. But in a nutshell, they represent the parts of a child that are inborn—the inborn temperament traits, that you as a parent cannot change…but you can influence.

Today, we’re looking at the second of the Nine Traits of the CoreSelf, and that is ADAPTABILITY.

ADAPTABILITY refers to how well your child handles changes in routines, plans and the environment.

Now, pay attention to the language that you use to describe your child’s adaptability. Is your LOW ADAPTABILITY child “stubborn” or “rigid,” or is he “consistent” and “cautious”? Is your HIGH ADAPTABILITY child “impulsive” or is he “flexible” and “open”?

Remember, words have tremendous power, and when we are describing our children, we need to pay attention to language we use.

For more parenting guidance or to book Nancy Rose to speak at your event, visit:

www.nancyjrose.com.

Video Parenting Tips: ACTIVITY (the First Trait of the CoreSelf)

Posted by | Acceptance, Kids, Parents | No Comments

Hi, everybody,

Nancy Rose here, author of Raise the Child You’ve Got—Not the One You Want.

We’re going to be going over each of the Nine Traits of the CoreSelf. Now, if you’re not familiar with the concept of the traits of the CoreSelf, or of the CoreSelf, I encourage you to go back and look at Episode #3, which talks about what these Nine Traits represent. But in a nutshell, they represent the parts of a child that are inborn—the inborn temperament traits, that you as a parent cannot change…but you can influence.

Today, we’re looking at the first of the Nine Traits of the CoreSelf, and that is ACTIVITY. Now, Activity is pretty easy to understand…it’s the amount of movement your child engages in, over time…not on a particular afternoon, but over time. Read More

Don’t Get Disconnected from Your Intense Child

Posted by | Acceptance, Intense Kids, Parents | No Comments

Intense children are hard to raise. Everything’s a big deal with intense kids…the good stuff, like happiness and laughter and excitement (they feel everything so strongly!), and the not-so-good stuff, like the frustration, the anger, the screaming when hurt. You always know how intense kids feel about what’s going on.  Read More

The One Surefire Way to Get Your Kids to Cooperate (HINT: it’s Not a Chart)

Posted by | Acceptance, Behavior, Kids | 16 Comments

The one surefire way to get your kids to cooperate is to lead with acceptance.

Make acceptance of who your children are the STARTING point in your parenting, not something you give conditionally when they meet your expectations. Why is this so important? Because each of us has a fundamental need to be understood and accepted exactly as we are. It’s a basic human need, and a very powerful one. If our parents don’t fill this need, we will seek approval and acceptance wherever we can find it. Gangs, predators, fringe elements. We all need to feel that we belong! Read More

Review of When Your Kids Push Your Buttons, by Bonnie Harris

Posted by | Acceptance, Kids, Parents, Resources | 33 Comments

Although acceptance is a fundamental human need, many parents struggle to accept their children as they are. In Raise the Child You’ve Got—Not the One You Want, I offer the parents’ path to acceptance:

  1. Start with the child you’ve got.
  2. Accept who your child is.
  3. Separate who your child is from what your child does, and
  4. Understand your CoreSelf and your behavior.

Read More

How Parents Can Make Lasting Changes

Posted by | Acceptance | 2 Comments

Another elephant metaphor?

Yup! There are two of them in Raise the Child You’ve Got—Not the One You Want, so this makes three. Several years ago, when I began sharing my message about the importance of accepting children for who they are,  a common response was, “But it’s soooooooooo hard!” Hearing this as many times as I did reinforced my determination to help parents understand what to accept and what to guide, and to share a step-by-step method that was clear, concrete, and user-friendly.

A good method is just the first step.

People need to be motivated to change. The parents who are most motivated to change are usually in unbearable pain, due to constant battling with their child or chilly disconnect, and they are willing to do what it takes. But what about the rest of the parents? Is it possible to make a conscious effort to shift towards leading with acceptance if your relationship with your child isn’t (thankfully) close to hitting rock bottom?

Read More

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